


Complicated

by TheBigLoserQueen



Series: My TFA Universe [20]
Category: Transformers - All Media Types, Transformers Animated (2007)
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Het, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Kissing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-13
Updated: 2015-08-13
Packaged: 2018-04-14 11:58:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 969
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4563789
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheBigLoserQueen/pseuds/TheBigLoserQueen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Even though she's forgiven him, Thornstriker is still afraid.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Complicated

Thornstriker couldn't suppress a shiver  when she was pressed against the rock walls, the Decepticon in front of her dropping to his knees. He rested his helm against Thornstriker's chassis, nuzzling the green metal. The Autobot scientist bit her bottom lip, a bit wary of the Con, but nonetheless stroked her helm as Bloodshed's servos worked carefully up and down her back, planting soft kisses across her torso.  
  
"I didn't think you'd come," Bloodshed whispered softly in between the chaste kisses.  
  
She shook her helm. "No… I-I said I would... Why would you think I wouldn't?"  
  
The Decepticon couldn't help it – he laughed once, though it wasn't a humorous one. "I don't know… Maybe because I hurt you all those years ago and only very recently revealed to you that I loved you and that I regretted what I did."   
  
Thornstriker said nothing.   
  
He slowly stood up and seized Thornstriker's face, planting a light kiss on her cheek. "Thornstriker… If you don't want to meet with me, it's fine… I'm not going to force you to do anything you don't want to do… Not again."  
  
She once again said nothing and looked at her pedes. Damn it, wasn't she supposed to be the older and more mature one here? If so, then why was she behaving like some cowardly and shy sparkling?   
  
No, they both knew why. Primus, she could still remember the horrors he had put her throught... It was only just very recently where Thornstriker had forgiven him after finding out the truth behind his crime. It still didn't mean she wasn't afraid or wary of the Con, even though she didn't mind being near him. In fact, there were times she actually felt safe around him because she knew Bloodshed would do anything to protect her.   
  
Yet, there other times where she would see a look in his optics that sent shivers down her spine.  
  
Honestly, her reasons didn't even make sense to herself. She trusted Bloodshed, but was still wary of him and his desires. She was here because she wanted to be, but a part of her wanted to leave or for that matter, never have shown up.   
  
Her logic was definitely flawed at this point and she wasn't sure how to fix it either.  
  
"Thornstriker?"  
  
"Y-Yes?"  
  
"... Can I kiss you?"  
  
Her cheeks turned bright right, but she eventually gave him a nod.   
  
The larger mech gently took a hold of her face and titled her helm up, very cautiously and carefully pressing their lips together into a soft kiss. Thornstriker shuddered, but nonetheless, leaned into it and kissed back. When Bloodshed's glossa darted out and licked her lips, asking for permission to enter, she shyly parted them to allow it in. She ended up mewling when the other's glossa pushed inside and intertwined with hers, licking and tasting it tenderly.    
  
The pleasurable and euphoric feeling then ended when she felt Bloodshed's servos dip too far down her back, barely hovering above her aft. It was probably just an accident and him getting too lost in the kiss, but she stiffened in fright at the feeling. The fright only grew worse when he seemed to pull her closer to him. She seized Bloodshed's upper arms and pushed back, crying out a soft and panicked "Stop!" as their lips parted.   
  
The Decepticon froze and immediately released her, fear clenching his spark as he thought he had done something wrong. Thornstriker pressed back into the wall, hugging herself tightly as he trembled and looked away from the Decepticon. Bloodshed just remained frozen where he stood, staring at her and waiting for her to calm down.   
  
Bloodshed wanted to comfort her, but he knew that now was not the time. His presence would not make her feel any better. If anything, it would probably cause her to have a breakdown. It happened sometimes though. Sometimes they would kiss and then... the memories would just come flooding back. She was terrified that the horrors Bloodshed put through would happen again.  
  
Yet, here she was, always meeting up with Bloodshed when asked.   
  
Finally, Thornstriker calmed herself down and stopped her trembling. She looked up at the red mech, who continued to stare at her, his faceplates painted with guilt and regret. He took a deep intake and walked back over to him, though she kept a fair distance in between them and kept her optics on her pedes  
  
"Thornstriker, I... I'm sorry."  
  
Thornstriker shook her helm. "No… It's not your fault–"  
  
"But it is."  
  
The green femme looked up, only to let out a startled gasp when Bloodshed wrapped his arms tightly around her, pressing her against his chassis. Primus, she could hear his spark pounding rapidly, making her wonder if he was all right. She looked at the bigger mech, confused.   
  
"I… I really wish I could take it back," he whispered, his voice quivering slightly. "I really wish I could. I love you so much and yet… I hurt you so badly... I'm grateful that you even forgave me for it but… I just wish things were different. But it's all my fault..."  
  
Thornstriker wrapped her arms around the great warrior and stroked his back. "Bloodshed…"  
  
He buried his faced into her neck cables and whispered, "Fuck… Everything is my fault. I'm sorry for everything… Damn it, everything's just so fucked up because of me… Everything…"  
  
Their relationship was fragile. Any wrong move and the whole thing would be crushed. Thornstriker wanted to give Bloodshed a chance and had forgiven him, but it didn't mean she wasn't afraid. And now, Bloodshed was always so careful, acting as if she was made of glass and would break at the slightest use of force.   
  
Nothing made sense, but that was their relationship. It was just too complicated to explain.


End file.
